The Power of One to Bring Change for the Many
By: Brian Hoeflinger, MD
May 18, 2025 | #47
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Disclaimer: Opinions are my own. Not medical advice.
Medical Trivia of the Week
Which part of the brain is most responsible for decision-making and impulse control, functions often impaired by alcohol? (the correct answer is at the end of this email)
- A) Occipital lobe
- B) Cerebellum
- C) Prefrontal cortex
- D) Brainstem
Making a Difference
Today, I want to share a story from 10 years ago that deeply moved me. It’s a reminder of the power each of us has, as individuals, to spark change in the world around us. Sometimes, all it takes is one person with courage and conviction to make a lasting difference. This story comes from a small town in Maine and a high school senior who reached out to my wife and me with a heartfelt request we’ll never forget. I hope this may inspire some of you out there of how much you do matter and do make in a difference in the world around you.
In January 2015, I was contacted by a high school senior in Fort Kent, Maine, which has a population of about 4,000. She wrote:
“I read your book about your son Brian and was completely moved by it.”
She asked if my wife and I could travel to her small town in Maine to talk to her school about the dangers of underage drinking. This request caught me completely by surprise.
When describing why she wanted us to speak, she wrote:
“Since underage drinking is such a major issue amongst my class, I have chosen to do a presentation on drinking and driving. Because drinking and driving is such a major issue amongst our school, my principal has asked that I present my project in front of the entire school. I feel as though it would be more effective if we had parents that have experienced a fatality from drinking and driving, and I was wondering if you would be interested in coming to our small town and making a presentation the first week of May. Thank you for your time.”
Amazing, to say the least.
I responded that we would be honored to speak at her school, but the logistics would take some effort. We would need to arrange time off work, coordinate care for our children while we were away, and account for travel and lodging expenses. Most importantly, her school would have to officially approve our visit. I thanked her for her commitment and interest in educating others on the dangers of teens, alcohol, and drinking and driving, but honestly, I didn’t expect much to come of her request.
The very next day, I received a call from her high school. This student had already spoken to the principal about our conversation, and the school was now actively working to arrange our visit and make her vision a reality.
It's humbling to think that this young woman, entirely on her own, reached out to us and took a chance on making this happen. The fact that she took the initiative to read my book at her age is remarkable. Even more remarkable is that she was actively trying to do something about an issue she believed in.
Clearly, there are teenagers out there who care deeply about the problem of underage drinking and take it very seriously. Teenage binge drinking remains a problem all across the United States. Deaths from drinking and driving still happen every day.
If more people took the kind of initiative this young girl showed, imagine what kind of change we could create in our world. Imagine the countless lives we could save, especially from preventable tragedies.
This young woman’s request affected my wife and me so deeply because she took action on her own, against the odds, to try and prevent teens from drinking and driving. She cares and she’s doing something about it.
That meant a lot to us.
I don’t expect everyone to understand, but the death of our son Brian was a complete and utter waste of life. He died at the age of 18 for no better reason than he was drinking alcohol with his friends, got drunk, and made the terrible decision to drive. What a reason to die. A senseless and unnecessary loss of such a promising life.
Or take the 17-year-old girl I saw the day after we received that request to come to Fort Kent. She died at the hands of a drunk driver. Her only mistake was being a passenger in a car with someone intoxicated.
Another wasted life.
Or the 19-year-old girl whose parents I had to tell that she was brain dead after being involved in a drunk driving crash. Her life ended after one night of “fun.” But where and when will it ever end?
My answer is: with people like that high school senior in rural Maine.
She took the initiative to help prevent teen drinking and, more importantly, drinking and driving. She’s trying to make a difference in the lives of others. She isn’t afraid to stand up and stand out against the crowd.
She should be commended for her bravery and for her convictions in trying to make the world a better place.
If only more people stood up for what they believe in, this world truly would be a better place for everyone.
My wife, my adult children, and I still aim to speak at high schools and other organizations about the dangers of drunk driving and underage drinking as much as our schedules allow. If you're interested in having us speak at your school or event, please don’t hesitate to reach out at the link below.
https://www.brianmatters.com/book-the-hoeflingers
Impactful Quote of the Week
"Difficulties are just things to overcome, after all."
- Ernest Shackleton
All my best,
Brian Hoeflinger
P.S. - if you enjoyed this newsletter, you may enjoy my book that details my life as neurosurgeon and the loss of my oldest son, Brian (see below a synopsis).
My Book
Life and Death . . . Two words with such opposite meaning and which inflict such contradictory emotions and yet are so closely intertwined in our lives. As parents, we bring meaning and life into this world through our children. Our lives become defined as a result. We learn the joy, hardship, and responsibility of shaping an innocent life. But a day will come when that life will be taken. For some, death will come too soon. This is the story of my son, Brian Nicholas Hoeflinger, who died unexpectedly at age 18.
https://doctorhoeflinger.com/products/the-night-he-died-the-harsh-reality-of-teenage-drinking
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Medical Trivia Answer:
The correct answer is C) Prefrontal cortex
